I’m sure we have all been there. In a situation that we want to say no to but we have a million excuses in our head so we don’t have to. “I’m being silly”. “I’ll enjoy it once I’m there”. I really do feel like we have become a world of yes people. We have forgotten how to say no to something and feel ok about it. We seem to think that we have to say yes to everything that comes our way, but thats really not true actually. I’ll admit, I am very much a yes person, I struggle to say no to people a lot out of fear of upsetting people. I worry that people won’t like me if I refuse. This has meant that over the years I turned myself into a bit of a doormat without really meaning to.
Don’t be a ‘yes person’
I am beginning to learn that you really do not have to be a yes person just so that people will like you. In fact, if the only way someone likes you is if you say yes to every single request they have, then maybe you should look at your relationship with them. They can’t be very good for you if the only person who gets anything out of the friendship is the other person. Friendship is a two way street.
Nowadays, life is very fast paced. Many of us live extremely busy lives with barely a moment to breathe sometimes. Is it any wonder we struggle so much with balancing everything in our lives? Yet we seem to struggle to say no more and more. Burning ourselves out isn’t good for anybody. I’ve watched it so much, and I tend to do it as well: “of course I can”, ”yeah no problem asap!” and before you know it, you have a pile of things to do and it feels completely overwhelming.
I already had the idea for this post in my head and then last night/today I just felt completely overwhelmed. I felt like I had taken on too much and I was drowning with everything I needed to do. But why? If I asked others to do some jobs, and said no a bit more I wouldn’t feel like I was drowning. And yet we all know we do this. So maybe we need to break this cycle and refuse. We need to give ourselves time to breathe.
One person can not do everything. It’s not possible without burning yourself out. So I’m going to take a step back, give myself time to breathe sometimes, ask for help more and say no sometimes when I need to.
I refuse to continue this cycle.
(Bonus points if you got the music reference!)